November 27, 2006 1 Comment
It’s monday morning and I’m already late. This time it was concious choice. I was sick better part of last week and kind of still am. I still have to go to school today, to finish our group project for tomorrow when we have the presentation. We had a lecture from 9am to 11am this morning, but I was feeling so bad that I decided to skip it.. There is one problem: I have missed this professor’s lectures and seminars so many times I wonder if I can get through this course after all. I do have the necessary books and I can get copy of the lecture notes, but still. We’ll see.
I’m bit stressed out and depressed about the school. I have been so excited and busy, but too busy to really get better. The doctor said to me last week that I’m sick now because I didn’t rest enough to get better from last time. Now I’m paying for that. Anyway, I’m glad that it is only just over 2 more weeks to the break when I can rest and get well, finally.
The depression is somewhat alerting. Not that I have tendency to get really depressed, but becauseI know it will have negative impact in my studying. I cannot concentrate and nothing feels worth caring. I’m not there yet, but I do feel the symptoms that I am on my way. This being concious and knowing what is happening feels good since I know I can do something about it and that is to force myself to do what has to be done.
It is not only because of this being sick and school stuff, it is also about money. I haven’t been able to work for a while when I have been sick and there have not been any shifts available that I could have done. Being sick, busy, stressed and poor might be just the reason to get bit depressed. But as the shrinks always say in TV: “Now that you know the situation, you can start taking it apart piece by piece and start working it all out.” Yup, yup. For starters I will put on my trousers and go out to walk the dogs. 🙂